Okay so here goes. I have had two letters addressed to 'The Parents of {ELDEST}'.
The first was an invitation to a genetic study and I was VERY upset about it as it was a shock to have post for him 3.5yrs later. I replied back and did say you know he is dead.
Then I got another letter last week and it was entirely wrong. I didn't even read the form - just phoned (no answer) so emailed and said you know what its upsetting. The head of genetics called me to apologise and asked what we have had and I then read the form 'consent form for adults who lack consent' - WTF?!!!
She was hugely apologetic and said did we still want to partake in the study. It's the DDD study (http://www.ddduk.org/) as she believes we will get the answers we need.
Get the answers we need.
This is bothering me. In as much of the sense of do I want the answers? Of course I want to know if there is a genetic link but I don't want to be told that well we can do something before you get pregnant to stop you having another cardiac baby.
I am done. I am done because I cannot go through the heart ache, the rollercoaster, the worry again. I have my boys in Heaven, I have my human and feline princesses and a soon to be a new puppy.
So I know it shouldn't bother me but it does.
