But this is our first proper family holiday with no one else.
And I cannot wait.
When we lost youngest boy, everyone said 'you need a break' 'go on holiday' and after a while we thought well nothing else is working, maybe we should try?!
So we booked a week's holiday to Egypt.
Worst mistake we made. Not least because of the destination. I've nothing against people who go to Egypt at all. The weather was lovely, the food was okay. The hotel was okay. Just the minute you stepped outside of the hotel you were lynched by people wanting to sell you things and that just ruined it for us.
It was the longest week of my life as I just wanted to be at home, seeing my babies every day. It took all my strength to get on the plane in the first place. I didn't want to let my husband down.
I cried everyday I was out there.
When we were on the flight home, my husband said to me that he didn't want to get on the plane either and had I not, he would have been happy but he did it for me.
So whilst some people can be full of useful advice when you lose a child, or children, I think you should listen to your heart as it wasn't the right time for us.
Then we fell pregnant with princess.
2011 we had her and we went to Ireland for my cousin's wedding.
2012 we went to Cyprus with my sister, brother in law and niece.
2013 we had another holiday to Ireland for a wedding.
So 2014 is here and we are off to Disney in Florida. And I cannot wait!
